Little humans are messy, paintbrush wielding, booger nosed, energizer bunnies with zero hand eye coordination. This may seem harsh, but anyone who has spent more then 20 minutes in the presence of a little human can attest to the truth of this description. Now, this isn't to say that I don't like the little humans...I do! I find them funny, and refreshing but I am not ignorant of their mischievous ways.
However, since I lay no claim to any particular little human I am quiet unnerved when people who do claim one or two of them can't keep them in check. As I see it pet owners are required to keep the pet in line and people owners should do the same. Furthermore, I am willing to recognize that my lack of experience in this area does not make me the most credible person to speak on the subject of the little humans but...
I do know that when I was an adorable little human I tried to have my share of public mishaps and quickly learned that my loving handlers had a stink eye that meant business. You know what I am talking about, that look or phrase that sends a clear message to shut up and is generally followed by the phrase "do you want to go to the car?" Even though you didn't know the particulars of what would happen at the car it was evident that the car was not going to be rainbows and cupcakes and therefore shutting up was wise.
Nowadays, I look angrily at the loud little human three tables down and wonder why it's handlers are not giving the stink eye or car threat. Something, anything really, has got to be better then allowing the little bugger to bounce on the booth cushions and yell " hey guys, look what I can do...hey look at me!" While I can appreciate a little narcissism and flash more than most there is a certain line of etiquette that should just never be crossed.
For example, When I worked at a fine establishment known as Starbucks there was one particular patron who often brought her tiny humans along for her morning jolt of caffeine. She ALWAYS bought them each their very own pastry and chocolate milk (obvious breakfast of champions) and proceeded to sit with them at a corner table while they "ate"...if we can even call it that. From my keen observations I am fairly sure that these particular little humans would leave the pastry in the bag then tenderize it like meat and dump the entire contents onto the floor. Soon after, without a glance our second thought, the patron would get up (without collecting a single item of trash) and leave with her tiny humans loudly, and obnoxiously in-tow.
I think it is safe to say, that the situation in which I have just described is rude and lazy parenting; which, as far as I can tell is all the craze these days! What happened to discipline, manners, and etiquette!!! It has all seemingly gone out the window and for the life of me I cannot figure out why??? If anyone has the answer to this question please...enlighten me.
Also, if you are planning on procreating in the near future, be a trend setter and teach your tiny humans a little bit about manners, indoor voices, and how to talk to adults politely....if you do i'll give you a dollar (I swear!)
XOXO
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